Pat calls in from Salida, CO to have Pete cheer him up about a miserable 1-0 loss to SKC, then we talk a little CCL (17:20), transfers (24:15), the $200m MLS expansion fee (31:15) and then do the most half-hearted preview ever of the rematch against SKC as the audio file starts to buckle under the strain (38:00).  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast, hit us up on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pete calls in one last time from vacation in Wisconsin to talk to Pat about the loss against LA (1:00), send our love to Nat Borchers (15:00) do an ambivalent ad for bike sharing(23:15) and then extend that ambivalence to the all star game (26:30), then preview the game against stupid Kansas City (30:10)! Rate us and subscribe on iTunes, listen on Overcast, hit us up on Twitter @morrisonicpod. 

Pete calls in from Wisconsin to recap a 3-1 win over Seattle, talk about the impact of Brexit on MLS, bid a fond farewell to Adam Kwarasey and preview what will hopefully be the last time we ever see Nigel DeJong!  This week's episode fake brought to you by Stetson and the Portland Outdoor Store!  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes! List on Overcast!  Follow and tweet at us @morrisonicpod

Pat & Pete drop the theme song this week (thanks a lot call recorder software update!) so that Pete can call in from the lobby of a Westin in Chicago to talk Montreal, plug an upcoming Ian Karmel show (15:20), come to the defense of good writer Jay Caspian Kang's bad article on MLS supporter culture (16:45) and preview the upcoming DER-bee against Seattle (26:55).  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast, follow and tweet at us @morrisonicpod

Pete calls in from vacation (sorry about the audio issues) to cheer Pat up, discuss another tie on the road against New York (2:55), half heartedly preview Wednesday night's game against Montreal (13:55), we do an ad for Jim & Patty's Coffee Shop (22:20) and then Pete inadvertently redepresses Pat by asking him to talk narrative (24:10). We put times in this description to see if Jon Big Boy Altschuler will notice!  F

Pat & Pete celebrate America by recapping a thrilling 0-0 tie against the West-leading Rapids, preview next weekend's game against a very weird NY Red Bull (Red Bulls?) team, say farewell to Dairon Asprilla and, finally, Ask a Fake Lawyer wades in on youth soccer teams' class action lawsuit agains 3 MLS Players and the MLS Players Union.  This week's episode fake brought to you by Riyadh Restaurant (1318 SE Hawthorne).  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast, follow and tweet at us @morrisonicpod.

Pat & Pete huddle quickly to do the shortest Morrisonic to date!  We recap a USOC loss to the Galaxy, we preview a game at Mount Doom and then we do a quick ad for the good dudes at Beermongers (located at 1125 SE Division)!  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast, follow and tweet at us @morrisonicpod!

Pat & Pete come back to the office on a Monday night to process the world's weirdest win against Houston, preview a mid-week US Open Cup game against LA Galaxy, talk about the 107ist's decision to drop Portland Boys from the chant sheet and then Pat goes mental about the future of soccer in America.  This week's episode brought to you by Alt + Co and Quarterworld.  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast and follow us on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pat & Pete reconvene to discuss a mostly encouraging draw at RSL, preview a home game against the DEE-nah-moh and share some optimism about the US Men's National Team.  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast, follow and tweet at us @morrisonicpod.  

Pat calls Pete on the road and suffers some marginal audio quality to celebrate all 3 Jacks we deployed against San Jose in US Open play.  We preview this weekend's game at Real Salt Lake and finally talk a bit about the Euros and the Copa, neither of which we are really paying that much attention to if we're being perfectly honest.  Finally, if any of you aren't already listening to Men in Blazers, you are dummies.  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast, follow and tweet at us @morrisonicpod.

Pat and Pete kill 45 minutes complaining about Jurgen, debuting Pete's ELO ratings and talking about the US Open Cup game against San Jose!  Why do we always go long when we have nothing to talk about?  Also, an ad for a public meeting on the draft clean up plan for the Portland Harbor Superfund Site!(https://yosemite.epa.gov/r10/cleanup.nsf/ph/portland+harbor+superfund+site) Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast and follow us on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pat & Pete reconvene quickly to go over the win over San Jose, plug next week's Robbie Fulks concert and talk about some other random stuff.  Subscribe and review us on iTunes, listen on Overcast, follow us on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pat & Pete try to find something useful to say about the Chicago game, Pat provides a very brief update on USWNT vs USSF thanks to @jvlaha, then we provide some analysis on the upcoming rock fight against the San Jose rock fighters.  This week's episode fake brought to you by STEVIE WONDER!!!!  Subscribe and review us on iTunes.  Listen on Overcast.  Follow us on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pat & Pete bask in the glow of Asprilla's return to the field and a much needed win over Vancouver.  Then Pat the doofus dad informs the world that the Thorns are good and fun (Thanks Pat!) We preview Chicago without doing a scrap of preparation, and finally Pete hides under his desk while Pat wades into the "Portland Boys" controversy and attempts to lecture young people on what to do with their privilege.  Subscribe on iTunes. Listen on Overcast. Follow on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pat & Pete try to muster some positivity about NYCFC and the upcoming Vancouver game, a little salary talk and then Pat does a convoluted ad/joke about redirecting asteroids (http://longnow.org/seminars/02013/jun/18/anthropocene-astronomy-thwarting-dangerous-asteroids-begins-finding-them/).  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes. Listen on Overcast. Follow us on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pat tries to cheer Pete up by talking about the Blazers, but it doesn't work, so we recap the game in Dallas and look forward to playing the always hilarious NYCFC.  Also, Pat plugs another podcast, this time focusing on behavioral economics and poverty reduction programs(https://overcast.fm/+Cfz_lrmk). We promise it's funny. Subscribe and rate us on iTunes.  Listen on Overcast.  Follow us on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pat tries to make sense of the world after Steph Curry goes atomic fireball on the Blazers, then we (mostly Pete, let's be honest) recap a 2-1 loss to Vancouver and preview a mid-week game at Dallas.  Finally, after Willamette Week of all places says nice things about the City's revenues from the stadium, Ask a Fake Lawyer goes back in timeand reviews the agreement that made it all possible.  All that plus a fake ad for a podcast about dark matter!!!  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast, follow us on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pat & Pete brave the local heat wave to review Toronto, preview Vancouver and do a fake ad for an absolutely disgusting brand of soda inexplicably beloved by expatriate Mainers arounds the world.  I guess you can tell which of us is responsible for uploading episodes.  Subscribe and rate us on iTunes, listen on Overcast, follow on Twitter @morrisonicpod.  

Pat rouses Pete from his sick bed (sorry Pete) to review the MLS suckfest that is a Wednesday game at Foxborough, preview Toronto and spend some time talking about MLS expanding to a bzillion franchises!  Review and subscribe on iTunes and then listen to us on Overcast!  Follow us on twitter @morrisonicpod!

Pat & Pete record a short one in which we preview the game Wednesday against New England and then . . . well, pretty much kill ten minutes before signing off.  Subscribe on iTunes.  Follow us on Twitter @morrisonicpod.

Pat returns from a bout of Black Death to have Pete tell him what the hell happened this week.  Rate us on iTunes, listen to us on Overcast, follow @morrisonicpod on Twitter.

Please don't be mad at all Dutch people for what happened in LA.  Pat & Pete review the game, complain about MLS, preview Wednesday's game with Dallas and use statistics to tell us what our hearts already know, that Rodney should never have left.  Write us a review on iTunes.  Tweet us @morrisonicpod.  

Pat & Pete dry their tears and recap Orlando, then preview LA.  Then, at the 20 minute mark, Ask a Fake Lawyer returns to go over the ongoing dispute between the US Women's National Team players and US Soccer.  This week's episode fake brought to you by Street Roots.  Follow us on twitter @morrisonicpod.  Write us a review on iTunes.  Listen to us on Overcast!

Pat & Pete come back from vacation to complain about the new bag policy at Providence Park, preview Orlando, decide whether we love Nagbe more than we hate Klinsmann (answer: Nagbe) and have a longish conversation about what's wrong with youth soccer (answer: Klinsmann).  Like us on iTunes.  Follow @morrisonic on Twitter.

Pat & Pete interrupt their respective spring breaks to talk about the RSL game for waaaaaaay longer than usual.  Pete does some stats work on game stoppage and who is ending possessions for the Timbers.  Pete worries about Lucas while Pat is already excited about Maddox.  Follow us #morrisonicpod.  Write us a review on iTunes.